Such deep mad respect for the difficult choice you're making. Definitely you are on the front lines of the friendship crisis. I wish we as the church were better at giving the social environment for friendships that those choosing celibacy need.
I have the blessing of a wife and kids but friendship outside of that has been a struggle ever since moving overseas to my wife's home country and entering the deceptively isolating "parent of young kid" phase.
Which often makes me feel we need the normalization of singles hanging out at young parent houses, as singles have the mobility/flexibility but loneliness, while the parents have the warm family vibes but often lack any adult conversation/interactions out of being stuck at home/ the fear of inviting someone into the chaos that is active parenting 0-4 year olds.
It would take a little getting past the social awkwardness for both sides, but they both may be well suited for each other. Some of my warmest memories as a college single was finding a pastor into mentoring young men and inviting us over after church for my first home cooked meal in months and their chaotic fam of 5-6 children!
It's easier said than done though. So on the days when plans fail and loneliness wins, I just have these song prayers:
Thanks for reading! I totally agree; we need to find ways to break down a lot of these horrific, societal barriers that exist between married folk, single folk, old folk, young folk, gay folk, straight folk, etc. Gonna be (re-)reading an excellent book that talks about how the early Church handled this soon—Joseph Hellerman's "The Ancient Church as Family".
Such deep mad respect for the difficult choice you're making. Definitely you are on the front lines of the friendship crisis. I wish we as the church were better at giving the social environment for friendships that those choosing celibacy need.
I have the blessing of a wife and kids but friendship outside of that has been a struggle ever since moving overseas to my wife's home country and entering the deceptively isolating "parent of young kid" phase.
Which often makes me feel we need the normalization of singles hanging out at young parent houses, as singles have the mobility/flexibility but loneliness, while the parents have the warm family vibes but often lack any adult conversation/interactions out of being stuck at home/ the fear of inviting someone into the chaos that is active parenting 0-4 year olds.
It would take a little getting past the social awkwardness for both sides, but they both may be well suited for each other. Some of my warmest memories as a college single was finding a pastor into mentoring young men and inviting us over after church for my first home cooked meal in months and their chaotic fam of 5-6 children!
It's easier said than done though. So on the days when plans fail and loneliness wins, I just have these song prayers:
https://open.substack.com/pub/snowhopebones/p/belief-in-the-existence-of-us-articlesong?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=4diwl5
Thanks for reading! I totally agree; we need to find ways to break down a lot of these horrific, societal barriers that exist between married folk, single folk, old folk, young folk, gay folk, straight folk, etc. Gonna be (re-)reading an excellent book that talks about how the early Church handled this soon—Joseph Hellerman's "The Ancient Church as Family".